Perception is not Reality
Our upcoming conference, “Building Towards 2022” is taking
place on 10 April in Doha. Topics to be discussed include cooling of
stadia with solar energy and the overhauling of the city’s
infrastructure, including the metro network.
To be delivered in less than a decade, these mega projects will have to overcome constraints in time, available resources and finding solutions with technologies that do not yet exist. The extent of complexities in collaborating in the build-up to 2022 cannot be underestimated.
A key success factor in all projects is the ability to allow the best ideas to be heard and taken on. The challenge is to know who to listen to and distinguishing what is reasonable and what is not.
A major pitfall for any decision maker is to be influenced by group dynamics. Even the most critical individual can be lured into believing that the most charismatic speaker with the most optimistic outlook also has the best ideas. When irrational arguments are left unquestioned and gain broad acceptance, the gap between desired and actual reality becomes unbridgeable and failure becomes inevitable.
The big question is if and how we can learn to better resist making irrational decisions and hold onto insane beliefs that are based on disastrous miscalculations. Having an awareness of how we listen is a good start.
While schools teach reading and writing from the day one, little emphasis is put on learning to listen. In a book released this month, “Power Listening: Mastering the Most Critical Business Skill of All”, Bernard Ferrari outlines interesting stereotypes of bad listening habits to avoid, and which are worth being aware of.
A few of his examples worth mentioning include: The Opinionator who listens primarily to determine whether or not his ideas conform to what he already knows to be true. A trait is the tendency to start sentences with “Listen . . .” and to end them with “. . . right?”
The Preambler is best typified by TV hosts who steer conversations with how they frame the analysis of any information and ask leading questions to produce the desired answers they are seeking.
The Perseverator appears to be engaged in productive dialogue but never advances the conversation. He is simply reiterating the same points and merely rephrasing what is already known. While wanting to seem wise and balanced he is really just holding everyone back.
Answer Man is a person who starts spouting solutions before he even has a clear understanding what the problem at hand is. In contrast to the Opinionator, who is simply just certain that his view is the correct one, the Answer Man is driven by a desire to impress and be seen as the smartest person in the room.
The Pretender is someone who shows his engagement by nodding at all the right moments and might even finish your sentences to show that he is on the same wave length and understands where you are coming from. People belonging to this last group often show a blanket of false empathy to effectively manoeuvre and advance an agenda.
Any inconvenience of accountability is thwarted by never formally agreeing with anything, merely expressing a cordial understanding for everyone.
It can sometimes seem that many people’s ability to listen diminishes the higher one moves up the corporate ladder. A reason may be that, in many cases inexperienced managers will see listening as showing uncertainty and that doubt is interpreted as weakness.
Yet, whether you are an intern or a CEO, stopping to remind oneself once in a while that your perception is not reality can be a valuable lesson to learn, no matter whether you are at the top or the bottom of the pile.
Oscar Wendel is the conference manager for Construction Week.
Our upcoming conference, “Building Towards 2022” is taking
place on 10 April in Doha. Topics to be discussed include cooling of
stadia with solar energy and the overhauling of the city’s
infrastructure, including the metro network.To be delivered in less than a decade, these mega projects will have to overcome constraints in time, available resources and finding solutions with technologies that do not yet exist. The extent of complexities in collaborating in the build-up to 2022 cannot be underestimated.
A key success factor in all projects is the ability to allow the best ideas to be heard and taken on. The challenge is to know who to listen to and distinguishing what is reasonable and what is not.
A major pitfall for any decision maker is to be influenced by group dynamics. Even the most critical individual can be lured into believing that the most charismatic speaker with the most optimistic outlook also has the best ideas. When irrational arguments are left unquestioned and gain broad acceptance, the gap between desired and actual reality becomes unbridgeable and failure becomes inevitable.
The big question is if and how we can learn to better resist making irrational decisions and hold onto insane beliefs that are based on disastrous miscalculations. Having an awareness of how we listen is a good start.
While schools teach reading and writing from the day one, little emphasis is put on learning to listen. In a book released this month, “Power Listening: Mastering the Most Critical Business Skill of All”, Bernard Ferrari outlines interesting stereotypes of bad listening habits to avoid, and which are worth being aware of.
A few of his examples worth mentioning include: The Opinionator who listens primarily to determine whether or not his ideas conform to what he already knows to be true. A trait is the tendency to start sentences with “Listen . . .” and to end them with “. . . right?”
The Preambler is best typified by TV hosts who steer conversations with how they frame the analysis of any information and ask leading questions to produce the desired answers they are seeking.
The Perseverator appears to be engaged in productive dialogue but never advances the conversation. He is simply reiterating the same points and merely rephrasing what is already known. While wanting to seem wise and balanced he is really just holding everyone back.
Answer Man is a person who starts spouting solutions before he even has a clear understanding what the problem at hand is. In contrast to the Opinionator, who is simply just certain that his view is the correct one, the Answer Man is driven by a desire to impress and be seen as the smartest person in the room.
The Pretender is someone who shows his engagement by nodding at all the right moments and might even finish your sentences to show that he is on the same wave length and understands where you are coming from. People belonging to this last group often show a blanket of false empathy to effectively manoeuvre and advance an agenda.
Any inconvenience of accountability is thwarted by never formally agreeing with anything, merely expressing a cordial understanding for everyone.
It can sometimes seem that many people’s ability to listen diminishes the higher one moves up the corporate ladder. A reason may be that, in many cases inexperienced managers will see listening as showing uncertainty and that doubt is interpreted as weakness.
Yet, whether you are an intern or a CEO, stopping to remind oneself once in a while that your perception is not reality can be a valuable lesson to learn, no matter whether you are at the top or the bottom of the pile.
Oscar Wendel is the conference manager for Construction Week.
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